“We need to find the courage to say no to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.” – Barbara de Angelis
Do you have things in your lives that you dread? Maybe it’s a friend or family obligation, or that friend that is so negative you always feel depleted after you’ve spent time with them? Your job? A relationship?
You must find the courage to say no to the things and people that don’t support you, that bring you down instead of lift you up.
It’s time to rediscover yourself! – We all get caught up in “life”. The status quo or comfort zone pulls us in even when we know there’s something more or something just isn’t right. It’s time to let that go!
Did you know that they majority of people would rather stay in a bad relationship than to be alone? How many people do you know (or have heard of) that are unhappy with their job but they continue to go there every day because it’s “safe”? There are many examples of people living a life they don’t love because they don’t want to say “no” to other people/things.
Below are four steps and questions to ask yourself to help you rediscover YOU and live life with authenticity:
1. Start to rediscover yourself by asking yourself what it is that you truly want:
– What is your life really about? What is your purpose?
– If there were no restrictions who would you like to be? What would you like to do?
– What is it that you have in your life right now that you hate?
– What one thing would you do if you knew you could not fail?
- The second step to rediscover YOU is to be true to yourself – really get honest with yourself.
– Am I living my life by my standards and expectations or someone elses?
– What brings me the most happiness in my life?
– If the opinion &/or expectations of others, society, religion, etc did not matter what would I do, what would I change, who would I be?
- Third, figure out what, or who, is in your life that is not serving/supporting you?
– What three thi
ngs am I doing regularly that don’t serve or support me?
– Who do I spend time with on a regular basis that does not support me or that “sucks the energy” from me?
– What do I want less of in my life?
– What am I tolerating or putting up with?
- Finally, now that you’ve done some of the work to rediscover who you are, it’s time to make moves to live with authenticity:
– If I were to FULLY live my life, what is the first change I would make?
– Who in my life is fully supporting me?
– How can I surround myself with people/situations that serve & support me? (networking groups, spiritual groups, religious groups, etc)
– How can I fully support myself?
Is it frightening to make changes? Absolutely! However, surrounding yourself with supportive people and avoiding negative people or situations will help you tremendously. Refuse to put yourself into any situation that isn’t supportive, fun and/or advantageous to your happiness and success.
It’s hard to let go of things that you’re comfortable with even if they are not good for you. Our natural tendency is to “stay safe”, however taking the risk to move to a happier place is most often the best choice.
Take an inventory of your life, the people in your life, the commitments – are they supporting you?
What can you say “no” to?
What do you need to do to live your life with authenticity?